Walking in the Valley I am not sure when I learned to actually ask for help. It wasn't really always in my nature. I know in high school I went through a serious trauma all by myself in my junior year. I never told a soul, not a friend or adult what I was dealing … Continue reading Just Ask
You are here was what the map said as I stood inside the hospital atrium. I kept looking at the map trying to compute where I was and how far away food could be. It had somehow been many hours without food, I remember realizing as I stood there. Why isn't there anything decent to eat … Continue reading You Are Here
My youngest daughter, while walking out the door today said she was quitting her internship at the local NAMI art therapy position. I asked why? I thought it was a good fit? She went on to tell me how her instructor for the internship had told her that her losing her sister was meant … Continue reading Things Not to Say…
There was a facebook video going around recently where the Dad wakes up and unwraps his wife and kids, then his car and shower and so on. At first, I thought it was stupid. Also, I will never get to "unwrap" one of my kids.... I left that thought on the back burner in … Continue reading Rethinking Thankful
In the late hours of 2015 Mikenna got mono. It came as a surprise to us because in 8th grade her best friend and her shared everything and they both tested positive for mono. This was the first time I learned that although the virus lays dormant, some people have it reactivated. Those people are … Continue reading The Leprosy of Loss
In nursing, we learn to look for signs and symptoms that lead to nursing diagnosis. If you follow the clues, they usually lead to the problem or the source. What if you were broken and lived in a world where you asked your source for signs? It's like an equation in my mind. … Continue reading Signs and Butterfly Kisses
I walked into work in my normal groggy, grumpy mood. It was 0615 and my coffee hadn't kicked in enough to care about whatever shenanigans were going on with the assignments for the day. The operating room assignments for the nursing staff can be an unfun task for the head nurse and I was thankful … Continue reading Kintsugi, The Art of Being Broken
I was driving home from visiting my oldest daughter for her birthday. It's a long tedious drive I had done dozens of times. After losing her sister, only 20 months younger than her, and her best friend, I count every birthday as a blessing. She finally looked like my beautiful girl again, except now she … Continue reading Into the Storm
When I find myself down for days, I know I need a project or something to distract me. A goal, a craft, something to pour my energy into. This can go on for days or weeks, sometimes working through meals and long past the hours when I should be sleeping. The tricky part is this … Continue reading The Balancing Act of Loss
My daughter loved puzzles, in her honor, as soon as I find a place the cats won't push the pieces off, I plan to put one out to work on. She could sit for hours looking at the various colors and shapes, forming the corners, then the edges and filling in all the spaces in … Continue reading Solving the Unsolvable
Raven and Roses 